Fanfics read:
Pizzapoon (by ZoisiteMoon)
Pizzapoon 2 Electric Boogaloo (by ZoisiteMoon)
Pizzapoon III The Threequel (by ZoisiteMoon)
Kong (by Porngirl180)

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Shawn

And we finished the Season YAAAAAAAAAY!

Season 9 draws to a close with the epic trilogy of Pizzapoon. The core hosts read their firsts (and probably their lasts) Uncle Grandpa fanfics. We had some more time at the end so we read about a normal human-sized woman getting a giant gorilla off. You know these summaries don’t do a single bit of justice to the show so just listen, ya know?

Season 10’s sign up sheet will be open until December 4th, 2019. The sheet is up on our website under the “Be a Guest” tab. The Season will start on December 11th, then go away for two weeks because of prior obligations and then Christmas. After that, Season 10 Episode 2 comes back on the first day of 2020. We look forward to growing into double digits with you all!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Embarrassing Words (by AlphaShae)
Naughty Bits (by Yarsian)

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Shawn, Riley, Moguta

Gotta keep this description short. We read about One Piece. We read about Dr. Who. We did the Yeti scream. Riley and Moguta joined us. Wow.

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Don’t tuck that furkey (by Sparrow)
you got that medicine i need (by dilithiumcrystallight)
Dick or Treat (by ultimateparadox)
Let’s forget the Treat (by bkitsune)

Readers: Stevo, David, Logan, Shawn, Mana, Gorejuice

Troy didn’t end up getting on fire in NBA Jam because he wasn’t on the show for three weeks in a row! Sorry, Troy. You’ll just have to keep fighting for it. This week, Val is gone the whole time, and David is gone after, like, ten minutes. But Stevo Shawn and Logan are joined by Mana and Gorejuice to read one story about a turkey and then three stories about Voltron. There’s a lot of ass eating going on. I mean, a LOT of ass eating. It’s kind of ridiculous. Tasty treats for Halloween, everyone!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Goosebumps You Choose the Scare – Welcome to Sand Hands (Botnik)

Readers: Stevo, Val, Logan, Shawn, Troy, Mike (Kinesis)

Dangit, Troy! How dare you come on two episodes back to back! That’s taking full advantage of the fact that you’re recruiting so many more terrible people for this terrible show, and even offering to host them or use your equipment to make it happen! Stop being such a good person!

Yes, Troy comes back again and this time brings his friend Mike (Kinesis) for our first ever choose your own adventure-style reading! Botnik’s seminal Welcome to Sand Hands is read by the crew and guests the whole time. How many times will they die? Will mom EVER stop reading our books? Was it a smart idea to bite the magician?! Tune in to find out!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Monkey Business (by vexxtrak)
Olympian Gluteal Chokehold (by Eroppai (FalstaffKisaragi))
Phoenix had to suck a LOT of dick to get his badge back (by gumdickshoe)

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Shawn, Troy, Ms. Pouty

Stevo and David finally got together again in person after five years of not seeing each other! We got proof of it, too! Maybe someday we’ll be unlazy enough to put together the travelogue we kinda sorta maybe filmed for like six minutes of total material, but hey, it still counts as evidence! But y’all don’t care about that. Y’all are here for the awful and the dirty, right? Yeah, you are.

Troy and Ms. Pouty return again (I can’t believe we haven’t scared them off yet). First, the core dudes read about Overwatch (this was before the Blitzchung thing, trust me, we probably wouldn’t have read it after that bullshit happened). Then, we talked about the semen capacity of primates. THEN we read the next story, and ruined Keijo with some buttsexy stuff. Finally, we completely decimate Phoenix Wright with a cheesy (literally, it’s about smegma) maybe sexy story. Clean your foreskin, bros. Also don’t keep your smega in cravats. That’s terrible.

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
In Which There is Little Dialogue (by Misaki_kaito)
Maybe It Has a Heart (by residenteviluwu)
Magic McCree (by Cawaiiey)

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Hippie, Wolfboy

The curse continues! Unbelievably we could only get Stevo, Logan and Val for the first recording with our guests Hippie and Wolfboy. David did a small makeup a few days later but Shawn was nowhere to be heard. Well, whatever. The show goes on, as it does. We read about Teen Wolf (don’t see why everyone loves it so damn much), Resident Evil (incomplete but we could see where it went and wish it went farther, Tyrant in nurse outfit supah sexy), and then Overwatch as a magic stripper or something. Note to self: never get into word origination arguments with any hosts. Ever.

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Sonic space time paradox fixed (by 1Plot2Story3Editing)
The Titanic Sinks In Panic (by GothPrincess666)
69 Hues the Dazed Knee 9 Wars of the Gears (by BusterManwomb)
69 Hues of Mindfork FNF reads FNF reads FNF reads Game Grumps (by BusterManwomb)

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Shawn, Beth, Sam

Well, we’ve got a new curse. A curse that hosts just can’t be free on Wednesday nights anymore. We had to cancel the live reading on this one but spent at least some-ish hours over the weekend that followed doing makeup recordings. So I cobbled together this episode from a session with Val, Stevo, Beth and Sam, and then another session with the core five. We read two bustermanwomb things, a titanic thing, and a sonic thing that Logan wouldn’t shut up about because he wants to name Stevo’s kid after it for some reason. It’s quite a trip to follow, and I can say that because I’ve been editing it for about 30 hours now!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
The Secret of the scopius doll (by Daddy of Dumptruck Chreg Bortz)
It’s All Too Much (by Beatle Babe)
Forza Horizon 3.docx

Readers: Stevo, David, Val, Logan, Shawn, Matt, Sara

What a weird way to spend a Wednesday, huh? We only finished two stories, one of which we had less than two pages left to go on, but what we failed to accomplish by reading a lot we made up for with laughing a lot! Also, can you turn your mic gain up a little bit and stop leaning back so far, David? Please? We hope you enjoy the totally serious not at all lampooned Forza Horizon 3 review. The wonderful Matt and amazing Sara joined us this time around.

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Daddydorf 2 Coming Home To You (by Th3Baron)
Mass Effect Milk Madness (by DiegoSandiego)
A Belmont In Castlevania Episode 1 – The Mad Forest (by Ryxixi)
The Secret of the scopius doll (by Daddy of Dumptruck Chreg Bortz)

Readers: Stevo, Val, Logan, Shawn, Disdonn, Cassie

So I’m just gonna come out and say it: I’m drunk and I haven’t slept much in the past few days. So we read a bunch of stuff, and also had a lot of fun. Cassie and Disdonn were guests. Insert whatever words you want for the next paragraph. Enjoy!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

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Fanfics read:
Sweet Salvation A Homer and Flanders Love Story (by juicydickhugger)
Snakes on a Plane (by Hans von Hozel)
Winnie the Pooh Assimilated by the Borg (by Peter Malak)
The Room (by Hans von Hozel)
Animal Farm (by Hans von Hozel)
Mass Effect (by Hans von Hozel)
Half-Life (by Hans von Hozel)
Australia (by Hans von Hozel)

Readers: Stevo, David, Shawn, Mirri, Epidehl

We read a LOT of stories in this one! And Logan and Val weren’t there either, so we had to actually try hard to carry the load this go around. Mirri and Epidehl joined us later but there’s so many stories I’d have to write at least TWO paragraphs in order to list them all out. And I’m a very, very lazy person. So…just dive right in, and get some holy hammers in your didly!

Thanks as always to our Patrons and fans!

Direct Episode Download (right-click and save, please only use this is you are unable to download it from Soundcloud)
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